把风景都看透，再看细水长流。

从来都不觉得我是一个好相处的人，但是那些愿意和我相处的人，他们真的都很善良。
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原来在低谷里还可以紧紧捉着的手臂，才是真正爱你的朋友。
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其实我真的什么都不要，只要一个不嫌弃我眼泪沾湿的衣襟，和一个拥抱让我放声大哭。
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要的不是回头，而是一个重新再来的机会。
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错了，伤害造成了，只能祈求上帝的怜悯和医治。
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盼望，只有在上帝里，谁说的都不算，只有上帝说了算。
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不够成熟，所以仍在犯错。
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如果真的爱，就晓得如何不住为你祷告。
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忆起过去的伤害吗？那就二合为一，让过去和现在的自己同时被释放。
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同情？真爱？不放手一搏，永远也不知道。
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放手让自己往后摔，是因为清楚知道上帝的手会托着我。
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安全感，不再是自我保护，而是清楚上帝不会让我受伤害，踏出去的那一步，他会为我负责。
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是要自己先把风景看完，还是等待那个陪你看细水长流的慢慢看。。


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It's been a week and my mood still swing ups and downs. Thank God I still have this very time, not drowning in my own emotion to update myself. Have been consistently struggled in the ambivalence between right and wrong. The right emotion, right thinking, right action.. 

I can never resemble myself to any of the bible heroes. But someone comforted me,
' You know David? God is pleasing with him not because he never made mistakes, but he knows God even better after every wrongdoings. And he is contrite in spirit. '
I know tears is filling up before I allow it to gush out.
It's so true when I recall the songs and psalms David has written, all are full of anguish and sorrow but the similarity of all songs are: they end with the hope in God. David has never failed to place his hope in God.
I feel I'm stuck when I'm trying to do more things. But my spiritual sister reminded me not to rely on my strength but just enjoy resting in Him. He don't need my any effort to mend the problem or dealing with struggles but to allow Him take over, completely letting go. 
Nobody has the final say, because if it is God's will, it will be done.
Before I can be loved or to love, let me just be the lady that pleases God.

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One of my friend's girlfriend facebook messaged me one day, asking if I'm interested in her boyfriend. Of course no or maybe I shall keep a distance with this friend. I find this rather pathetic than ridiculous. 
The foundation of a relationship is trust. I want my relationship to have this trust, not because I trust him, but because both of us trust God knows the best for us.

God will work on me and transform me. Amen.