aloneness = loneliness ?

"" am i anticipating for a long last relationship?

i might just fooling myself if i say no.

but seriously i know i shouldn't hope for anything here. ""

they seems like bringing the same meaning

but it is not.

studying alone, eating alone, hanging around alone 

i never feel lonely

just the aloneness

but forcing myself mingling with the friends they mean

i feel extremely lonely

being throwing at a corner

do i really just feel the belongingness studying at this place

or am i just hoping people willl realise my existence

so that they can easily find and spot me if i fix my where to go

human is created with the needs and desires for companionship

am i anticipating for a long last relationship?

i might just fooling myself if i say no.

but seriously i know i shouldn't hope for anything here.

i think is necessary for me to clarify

i'm not saying bgr, just a last long friend.

i'm not isolating myself from people

nor i push away people that trying to get near to me.

i will open up my heart

if someone taking the courage to knock the door of heart

i'd spent time with people who first approach

and i never regret doing so.

if you do care about me

you won't take me that easily.

if you cherish me

you won't let go that easily

if you are me

you will know how heartbroken i am.

一个人，没有笑的理由，也没有哭的理由。