I HATE!

"" the life seems like so wrong to me.

how much you think i can bear?

how much pain you think i can endure?

how much and how much you think i can suffer?

with a poor, fragile and broken soul? ""

God,

i really cannot understand it.

what is your mighty planning in me??

i'm feeling so uneasy now.

with all your planning.

struggling all the way until now,

the life seems like so wrong to me.

how much you think i can bear?

how much pain you think i can endure?

how much and how much you think i can suffer?

with a poor, fragile and broken soul?

i wish to be like you.

but,

with all i know,

i'm not you and i can't be like you.

again and again,

receiving the failures in my life.

getting such a bad result in my once and only exam.

not-yet-solve problem in my relationship with others.

and the most i can't understand is connecting me with the one i try to escape with?!

how can You again, linked me with that person when i'd suffered from the mental stress in the past year just because of her?

and let me be under her again?

i hate it i hate all this!!!!!!!!

i hate all the planning.

the planning that push me into deep valley.

I'm despair.

God, let me be clear with you.

I HATE to be with HER!

i don't care what and how you mould me.

but I'm ENOUGH with it.

I'm not the child of the CHRIST.

I don't fit in.

I'm nothing.

Life is so unfair to me. I never be a whole.