完结篇

每个故事的开始，都只是为了一个完结篇。一部能够让你迷上的电视剧，不也都为了一个结局而设。而不管是哪一个结局，留下的都是淡淡的忧愁，一个终于等到最后，却是有点失去什么的心情。
我不是一个勇敢的人，至少，当我可以选择逃避的时候，即使我都让自己表现得很勇敢。只是，当我很慌乱的时候，我真的希望我不是那个写下结局的人。

I'm all alone

What people comment about me is that I'm a loner or a soloist.
Yes, I'm well-off alone, like what she described me.
love to being in my own world, doing stuffs that people will never appreciate, having thoughts that people might not understand. I know I'm different, and I know I'm always do.
Even when thing messed up, I will keep it all to myself. 
But life changed me. Too many warm hearts transformed me.

纠结

不是从来不知道，而是太久没有感受这样的纠结了。自以为很聪明，能够把玩情绪情感，让自己置于事外，最后还是一脚陷进来。讨厌纠结的情绪，明明很多思绪，却都搅在一起。。

wordless

I have been leaving my laptop at the 'new post' page of the blogspot, thinking I should have write something after so long time but just can't figure out something wise?
Shall I talk about my first year in university which had just come to the end? sounds lame. Talk about haze? what can I do with it then. Talk about my troubles facing right now? It's just too complicated. Nothing seems right for me. 
I thought I could have post something meaningful when I finally find time sitting in front of laptop without any rush, I thought some ideas could just pop out and once I start writing it will seems no ending, but.. I FAILED. 
Ok fine, I guess I have nothing to say.

 

It's not the end. God is leading.

Dear people, I'm sure the result of election is dejected. but let us just continue to set our eyes on Him for our hope is not from man but from Him. He heard our cries, I'm sure He did and He promised to interfere! What a beautiful promise from Him. When Lord is for us, nobody can go against us.
Do you still remember He sent His son to die on the cross? This is to accomplish His will. I'm certain that Malaysia will be resurrected. Do not lose heart on the trials. You might fall into the trap of Satan.

Prayer for nation

I was thinking how to spend this whole weekends for the past week. Thinking to out for a shopping spree for my upcoming dinner as most of my friends going back hometown. Of course, not for voting as we are still underage but just to enjoy the slightly long break. Too bad I find no one to join me as everybody worries about the chaos during and after the election. Kinda disappointed to fail my plan but immediately, a blog post of my roommate's friend reminded me there is something more meaningful I can do.

I'm not sure if I'm a political type of person. No matter how, I only opened my eyes to politic year ago. I used to think there is none of my business of all the evil schemes or filthy tricks behind the power as long as I'm doing good in my own dream world. But I do realize the more I love my country, the more I concern about it.

归属感，真实

今天好像比较闲了，是应该要更新我的近况了，尤其上次那个有点emo的post之后，哈哈。
真的真的，很不好意思，让爱我关心我的人担心了。这样的经历，我知道上帝要我成长。回到家人的怀抱，妈妈的祷告释放了我，让我察觉心里之所以纠结背后真实的原因。上帝再次用歌咏的胜利提醒我他对我的爱，是不能做比较的。我还没有完全复原，但我知道上帝的爱与周围人的关怀，会让我更加茁壮成长，我一定要变得更加强大，才能安慰身边失丧的灵魂。。
因为爱，是上帝给我们的天性。

家，是避风港

有谁还不知道的话，我回家了 。其实只是短短一个周末周日，可是这次回家我真的很开心。我是坏孩子，平时玩耍时都不见影子，只有在跌倒流血时才会跑回家哭闹。
而这一次，又摔跤了吧？真的好像过得不怎么好。。其实明明应该很开心的，可是不知怎的，心里堆积了一堆情绪，怎么理都理不清，只想逃。。

little faith

I just realize how little faith I have now. This is the first in my life that I'm really testing and stretching my limit. It is just the feeling that I can be broken down any of the time. Like the rubber band keep on stretching and finally break. 
I know I shouldn't look at my own limit but to look upon God's limitlessness who will work in my life, work in this path that he has chosen for me. I know He definitely will work it out, I know He will exalt me one day, I know every statements in bible, I know His promise, I know I know.. But knowing it by brain doesn't sooth the burden in my heart. I always know God's love God's plan God's promise by my mind, and only now I realize my brain and heart can be totally separated. They are not always at the same side in every case, at least for now.
I admit I have such little faith in Him. I know I'm not much better as a follower. But Lord, please let me still hold on to your words :

He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you." ( Matthew 17:20 )

It is you who given me this promise. I really have no idea what other efforts I can give to achieve a better result. I had given everything in. Lord, uphold me even I have little faith. Nothing will be impossible if I have this little faith in you. 

Dear Abba Father, I call upon your name and beg you, listen tentatively to the prayer from your precious daughter.

那个人

如果有那么一人，真的仔细的把你纳入在他的未来，那是种什么感觉？
如果有那么一人，愿意对你付出永远的真心，那是种什么期待？ 
如果有那么一人，对你的等待是无限期的，那是种什么感动？
如果有那么一人，让你能够联想的不只是热恋的浪漫，而是能够永远握在手心的幸福，那是种什么滋味？

Bangkok backpack adventure~ day 2

28.1.13
A relaxing morning having breakfast in hotel ( though it was just a sausage, 2 eggs & bread ). We hired motor taxi to bring us one round at that area, Saphan Khwai. It cost us 30 baht per ride.

We travelled by BTS Skytrain to Phaya Thai and by Airport Rail Link to Ratchaprarop, the second hotel we stayed, Siam Star Hotel. EY was alerted enough to get hotel's map and address for everyone in case we need to show the road to the taxi driver later. If I'm not mistaken, here is the town city of Bangkok, somewhere as happening as our KLCC. More shopping spree is going on today. We managed to get taxi agent to drive us free to Siam Paragon as some of planning to visit Siam Ocean World with promotion 700 Baht per ticket. We had our lunch at Siam Paragon food court, still trying some local food and we split.

bangkok backpack adventure~ day 1

27.1.13
Here I am, back from Bangkok & the very meaningful mission at Pulau Ketam. It's always good to serve people. Realizing it's already a week away from the first day at Bangkok, but still, every each scenes worth me to reminisce & put into words.